Chasing IT?

Pam’s Journey ~ Day: 334

Miles walked: 940

Miles remaining: 60

Days remaining: 32

I went to the farm this weekend and had the best walk that I’ve had yet. I know, I’ve said that a few times over the miles but it is possible that they just get better and better.

I had a plan when I started out. I’ve been wanting to do this for awhile now but it wasn’t a practical idea for my walking route at home.. but it was perfect for the farm. I wanted to walk until I was done. I didn’t want to walk for an hour or so like I usually do in the mornings before work. I didn’t want to walk until I was kinda tired or until I decided that I needed to get home and get my weekend to-do list started. I wanted to walk until I was Done. Physically done.

Here’s the thing. During my walks, sometimes it takes awhile to get past “me” and on to Him (God). I get there but many of my walks are more about me than Him. It’s a human thing, and I know our gracious God is completely understanding of my attempt to dedicate time specifically to Him.. but many times I get lost in the world of things that I’m going through. He’s always there and I usually remember to ask Him to guide me through It, to be with me during It, and definitely to help me with It. IT? yes, IT. Everything. Life, Relationships, Jobs, Finances, Family, Friends, Pain. All of IT. Well, I wanted to get past all of that and just be out there walking.. me & God. No It.

So, I started out heading south like I usually do when I walk at the farm. The neighbor’s dogs joined me as I walked by. We decided to try the first mile that went east since I’ve never taken that road before. I’ve always just stuck to the cemetery road since it’s paved, but today called for some adventure. Especially since this road looked so inviting. It was sort of a rocky dirt road on a hill with trees lining and hanging over in places. That’s my kind of road… and of course, the thought of what lies at the end of such an alluring road. We went up the hill, through the trees that were shading the road, enjoying the break from the sun. We did a little looking into the thick overgrowth off the sides of the road, because you never know what you’ll find out there and then we topped the hill and found nothing. There wasn’t anything special at the top of that hill, past all the allure. And so back to the old cemetery road we went.

We headed south again, like usual, past the road that leads to my uncle’s place, past the cows that act like my biggest fans with all their hollering, and then I notice a cow in the road ahead. The dogs notice it too and they head out to it. So, I call them back fearing that they might scare it to the highway that I could see behind it. That’s all I needed, was to be responsible for a cow getting hit on the highway. We turn around and back up the old cemetery road we go… again.

There aren’t a lot of options on this road, so we take the road that leads to my uncle’s place. I’ve never considered taking it before because, to be honest, it looks like a boring road. It’s just the place where the doe crosses early in the morning. So, for lack of options, I take the boring road. There’s not much to look at, but then I come to a cross road.. except, the boring road is now lined with sunflowers and is climbing a hill. Well, you know me.. I’ve got to see what’s at the top of the hill! So, I pass up the cross road and keep going up the hill until I find.. a rock. That’s all that was at the top of that hill. Well, that and more red dirt road but the trees and the sunflowers were gone. It was just a road. With a rock.

That’s about when the neighbor, and owner of the dogs, showed up. He loaded them up and took them back home so I could “enjoy my walk”. I was loving this walk, and loving all the things that I was seeing. I saw a lizard, a road runner, some doves, a scissortail, several cows of course, and a rock. The smell out there is amazing. It smells green. That’s the only way to describe it. The sun was hot, the roads were dry and dusty, and everything smelled green. It was awesome.

Now that I don’t have the dogs leading my way, I turn away from the rock and head back down the hill on the boring road. The boring road with that cross road that I mentioned earlier. Looking down the cross road, and knowing that I’ve found a lot of nothing on all the other roads that I’ve tried today, made me wary of the nothing that was most likely waiting for me down this road too. It was a road that didn’t look well traveled. There were weeds growing down the middle of the road and it was more narrow than the other roads. Trees lined the road and hung over, just like those roads that I love. The ditches were very over grown with trees and weeds and it felt like they were towering over me as I started walking down that road.

All of the crickets and locusts that had been part of my walk before seemed to quiet down. The dogs were gone. There wasn’t any wind. It was quiet and calm. It was me & God.

There was nothing else to think about. All of “me” was gone. I was a little shocked that I was still walking because my mile tracker had just told me that I had already walked over 5 miles, but it felt like I had just started. That road out there in the country, that obviously isn’t traveled much, was the best road that I’ve ever been down. We get so busy trying to see what’s at the end of our roads that we don’t enjoy “the road”. God wasn’t leading me down the road to see what was at the end. He just wanted me on the road.

That road ended too, and I circled back around to the old cemetery road and headed back home. I never could have walked that far on my own, so it’s a good thing that I got past “me”, because I needed God’s help on the way back. Five miles of me chasing IT, 1 mile of just being on the road that God wanted me to be on, 2 miles of awe at that road that I just walked, and 1 mile of a lot of leaning on God to get me back home = my best walk yet.

The distance we’ve come in the time that we’ve walked is immeasurable. ~ Tasha & Pam..

Done. I was completely Done… and it was awesome.

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Categories: The Journey to FIT, Walk with JESUS | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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