Posts Tagged With: love

The Big Easy!!

Pam’s Journey ~ Day: 362

Miles walked: 1000

Miles remaining: 0

Days remaining: 4

Before I give the wrong idea… let me just say that there is NO Big Easy. Whatever you want, whatever your goals are, it’s not going to be easy. Anything worth having is going to be hard work.

I finished my 1000 last week and let me tell you that it was an amazing feeling when I dinged 1000… and let me also tell you that it was 1000 miles of hard. It wasn’t easy. It was awesome and I would do it again and again but it wasn’t easy. There was no magic button on the days that I didn’t think that I could walk another step, let alone another mile. But there was Jesus every step of the way, He was there and at the end when my 1000 miles of doubting myself was lifted from my shoulders.

The next chapter of my life has me a little nervous. Not scared nervous but just nervous because it’s a brand new thing for me.  I’m going to open a nutrition club. I have worked for doctors for 20+ years and I’m going to phase that part of my life out during the next year and run a nutrition club. It shouldn’t be so different really.. I’ll be helping people get healthy from the inside out instead of watching them cover symptoms with medication. But still, it’s new.. so I’m nervous of change.   

Finishing my 1000 helped me have the confidence to know that if I lean on God during the next chapter, like I did during my walk, then I can do it. Maybe the walk prepared me, built my strength, renewed my faith, and gave me courage.

My devotion today was about Jesus healing the lame man who had been sick for 38 years. The man had been lying near the healing water, but didn’t have help getting in the water. The devotion didn’t focus on Jesus healing the man, but on the man’s excuses. The man was waiting on someone to help him instead of trying to help himself. He blamed the people who went ahead of him for him not being able to get in the water. 38 years.. Did he ever ask anyone for help? He made excuses for 38 years, until Jesus told him to pick up his mat and walk.

– Jesus told him, “Stand up, pick up your mat, and walk!”~ John 5:8

Now it’s time to “pick up my mat” and go. It’s time to stop watching everyone else go by while I sit and think that I can’t. I’ve got to make the choice to get up and do what God has prepared me to do. It’s time to go after my goals instead of watching everyone else pass me by as they go for theirs. My life is changing and I can either jump on board and sail my boat with God at the wheel, or I can find another unsatisfying place where I’m just treading water day in and day out. (I think God has more in store for me that just treading water!)

There is still one thing that I probably fight God more than anything else. Accepting help from other people. It is so HARD for me. God has brought many amazing people into my life. People who inspire me, encourage me, and people who I want to inspire and encourage. I have always found it hard to ask others for help but I have learned that when God brings people into your life, sometimes He brings them there to help you. I’m definitely not saying that God brings people into your life to do everything for you so you don’t have to work hard to get what you want. Not at all… but if you’re going after your goals and trying to reach the dreams that God has placed in your heart, then maybe you should look at the resources around you instead of trying to get there all by yourself.

These people who God has placed in my life don’t wait for me to ask them for help, they offer to help me. Who am I to turn down the help from someone who God has placed in my life for possibly that one specific thing? Am I turning down help that I need when God has put it right there for me? That’s like turning down God’s help, right? So there is my struggle.

That’s where I’m at. I know that I can’t do everything by myself as much as I might try. God intended for us to do life with other people for a reason and then He puts specific people in our lives because He knows the plans that He has for us. His word tells us to love others and help others. So every time I don’t ask or accept the help of someone that’s right there and offering, it’s like I’m doubting God as much as I doubt myself.

There will be trials.. He tells us that. There will be hard work, but it will be worth it and rewarded in the end. There will be people along the way that are sent to do what God has led them to do and that might just be to help me at the moment that I need it most. So, again… When God is trying to help me and save me. All I have to do is accept it.

I want to thank everyone that has been on my 1000 miles with Jesus journey with me. You have supported this walk and encouraged my steps. If you were walking the walk and logging miles on this journey, I hope you never stop walking with Jesus. If you started but stopped and don’t think you can start again, you can! Jesus is waiting for you every step of the way. Don’t ever give up and don’t ever think you can’t because we Can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. Don’t doubt that. 

More than anything else, I want to thank Kristen for sharing this walk with us and letting us join her on it and I want to thank Tasha for taking God’s lead and bringing us all together or none of this would have ever happened. When God brings people like them into your life, AMAZING things are in store for all of you! ~ pam

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Top of the World!

I’m on the top of the world lookin’ down on creation

And the only explanation I can find

Is the love that I’ve found ever since you’ve been around

Your love’s put me at the top of the world.

Pam’s Journey ~ Day: 271

Miles walked: 710

Miles remaining: 290

Days remaining: 95

It feels good at the top. When everything seems to be going well. Things are good, easy, and enjoyable.. Life is moving by at a fast pace and there’s not much that you can even think to complain about. Not that I need something to complain about but are things going too good?

That’s how things have been feeling for a while. For probably the last month or so, things are good. I’m walking, working, living, and it’s just flashing by so fast that there’s not much time to think about anything. But there is something. I just don’t know what it is. I started noticing it in my LifeGroup when we would take prayer requests or talk about what’s going on in our lives over the last week. I didn’t have anything. Things are just “good”.

Don’t get the wrong idea.. I’m not that “doom and gloom” person who is always looking for the other shoe to drop. I don’t expect something bad to happen because things aren’t suppose to be this good. I’m a glass half full, everything will turn out good in the end kind of person. Things just seem a little off lately.

This week, it’s been hard to stay focused on my walk. No.. the focus has been getting hard for 2-3 weeks but this week it was down right impossible to focus. The walk. Jesus. Relationship. Communication. I can’t even tell you what most of my focus has been on. I even came up with a new “focusing tool”. When I feel distracted (which has been almost the entire hour that I’m walking) I think to myself, “every breath, every step, all day, every day”. That has been my request to Jesus to try to stay focused on Him and to continually seek Him.

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. ~ Matthew 6:33 NLT

I got a text yesterday. It was an invitation to an impromptu girls night out to a neighborhood concert and fireworks show. I immediately accepted. This is actually unusual for me. I don’t accept on the spot without details and it’s even more unusual for me to accept from an unknown number that texted me. (Cell phone issues and lost numbers and all that.) So, after accepting this invitation and asking who was texting me, I find out that it’s girls night out with Kristen and Tasha.. my 1000 mile sistas!

There is nothing that I needed more than a night with my girls – My Godly Gal Pals, My Cupcake Companions, My 1000 mile girls.

We met and went for dinner. That alone is a blog post in itself, but it was awesome and so nourishing for the heart and soul. We talked about stuff and we talked about nothing and we talked about oxen.. There is no better time, than time spent with the other two legs of our tripod. The strength I get from our relationship is like that of the cord of three strands. The completeness that we each bring to the other.. is like the magic in Vicki’s Tres Leches Cake at The Purple Burro. You just have to experience it to know what I’m talking about.

After dinner, the trek to the neighborhood concert was another blog post in itself but once we got there and settled in, it was pure enjoyment. The music was fantastic. The atmosphere of the neighborhood was envious. So, why was I still feeling somewhat distracted? I was having a great time, with my favorite people, and spending my night “flying by the seat of my pants”, right?

Then it hit me.. like one of the BOOMS from the fireworks show. Everyone always says, “The devil gets you when you’re down”. That’s when we’re usually most vulnerable. Well, I don’t have too many downs so could he be trying to distract me while I’m up? In actuality, wouldn’t that be the better time for him to “distract” us? Things are good, so who would notice Satan creeping in to do what he does best. Distract us from what’s important – The walk. Jesus. Relationship. Communication. If he can’t bring us down – then his next best trick would be to blur our focus.

Yes, my focus has been blurred. My concentration has been attacked. I have been struggling to keep my mind where I want it on my walks. I’ve been struggling with focused thoughts to blog about. I’ve even been struggling to read my devotions every day. But “things” are still going good. There has been nothing that would make me think that I’m being attacked.. nothing except my inability to focus on what is most important. My relationship with God.

You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.” ~ Genesis 4:7 NLT

Did it take a completely unfocused night of fun with my girls to bring me back in focus? Yes :).  I may have figured it out sooner or later but most likely later.. I probably would have started getting into a funk of a mood and wouldn’t know what was causing it or how to fix it until it just ran its course. That’s what usually happens. Looking back, that’s exactly what happens from time to time.

So, I will sing with my girls at 10:46pm to the “Top of the World”, while we’re looking to run into a McDonald’s for a $.27 cup of ice water. I will creep through parking lots with them to satisfy our curiosity, and I will most definitely cherish my unplanned escapades of seat of my pants flying silliness. Sometimes that’s what it takes to refocus on what matters most.

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Blessed Beyond…

Pam’s Journey ~ Day: 243

Miles walked: 613

Miles remaining: 387

Days remaining: 123

Do you ever just want to “high-five” everyone that you see? Maybe they look like life is giving them a beating right now and they could use that little smack of what you’ve got.. or maybe they’re just glowing with an energy that looks contagious and you wanna get some of that! That’s me lately.. mostly the, “I want to share what I’ve got” part.  If you live in Westbury North and see the lady walking every morning at 6-7ish.. the one that waves at you every day when you’re leaving for work – Yeah, that’s me. And that wave is your high-five!

Things are good.

Things are good and I’m giving thanks and praise for all of it to God. Am I doing something different than I’ve been doing for things to be going the way they are? I’m giving more and more to God, and I’m listening more and more to God. I’m trying to put myself where He wants me and follow where He wants me to go… and let me tell ya, it’s pretty awesome. He has the most amazing ideas… just sayin’

When we first started this walk and decided that we would be blogging our journey, I was extremely anxious to say the least. The walking part – over the top excited, yet completely clueless as to what would unfold along the miles. The blogging part – well… blogging isn’t exactly “my thing”, so it made me a little nervous. It’s not nearly as bad as my mind was trying to make it but sometimes I just feel like a big blank new post page with nothing. I look around, thinking about what’s going on in my life this week and sometimes there’s nothing jumping out at me.. nothing except for countless blessings.

I’m so blessed with the friends and family that surround me and support me. I don’t know how I got so lucky… but I do try to surround them and support them right back. I love being with them and just having them in my life. They are the kind of people that every time I think of them, I smile. I thank God for bringing me to them, them to me, and giving me exactly who I need in my life.

I’m Blessed to have won the “friend lottery”.

I have one of those special friends that has been in my life since my first day of 1st grade. Ramona. We don’t live close enough to get to spend much time together but any time we see each other or even don’t see each other, I know that she’s there if I need her (and I’m pretty sure she feels the same). 30 minutes together and we can be caught up on kids, friends, family, life and all the missed years. We were fortunate to get to take a family vacation together over Christmas last year and it was a week that I’ll never forget.

I’m Blessed beyond years for having a life-long friend that means the world to me.

Last month, Ramona texted me to let me know that her momma passed away. Momma Locke was very sick for a very long time. She was in pain and has suffered more than most people ever will. I was able to visit with her several months ago after she had been in the hospital and the doctors had once again said that she wouldn’t last much longer, but she just kept proving them wrong. She was such a strong and very stubborn little lady and she knew that she was ready to go when it was God’s time. During our visit, she kept telling me (us) to live. Live now while we can. Don’t wait. Don’t say you’ll do things. Do them now. Live.

I’m Blessed beyond this life that I’m living and even excited for the eternal life that Jesus gave me.

When I got the message from my friend, we were on our way to Bricktown for the Walk a Mile in My Shoes event to support foster kids awareness. This event was something that Taelor wanted to do as soon as she heard about it. I’ve mentioned my passion of being the best parent that I can be to my daughter. I tell Taelor quite often that she is my most important job. So, when we helped with a foster kids project before Christmas, it gave her an awareness that not only did some of these 8000+ kids in Oklahoma not have toys or essential winter clothes, but they didn’t have a parent that thinks they are their most important job. It helped her to see that even if her momma doesn’t buy her the $100 jeans that “everyone” at school is wearing or her cell phone doesn’t measure up to the newest and best out there, she is very lucky to have a momma. One that loves her so much to stay “all up in her business” even when she doesn’t want me to be there!

I’m Blessed beyond measure because I have so much more than I deserve when others have so little.

If you’ve followed our blog for any time at all, you know that I mention parenting a lot. Taelor is always on my mind and always in my prayers. She’s the first and last person I see every day. She’s my ChickieBoo, my dotter (daughter), my friend, my delight, my button pusher, my inspiration, and my legacy. I could go on about her for days and sometimes do, because there aren’t enough words to express my love for her. I’m sure it’s just a parent thing. Seeing her grow into one of the most amazing people that I’ve ever known is such a blessing. This weekend we were baptized together and I can’t even put into words what that means to me…

I’m Blessed beyond words… I can’t believe what God is doing in her life and that I get to witness it every day.

There was a time when I didn’t have many people in my life and that wasn’t so long ago. Then, I put myself out there. That’s all I did. Put myself out there and things started happening. I always say, “it would be pretty great to win the lottery… but I guess I should start buying a ticket if I ever expect to win”. It’s the same with everything you want in life. Put yourself out there, buy “the ticket” to what you want and where you want to be. Follow God’s lead and you will find yourself being blessed. So blessed that you lose count when you try to name them all.

So, I’m going to keep living. I’m going to Live Now and put myself out there a little more every day. I’m going to dream about the best tomorrow that I can imagine and I’m going to go for it. Yesterday may have been good, or maybe it wasn’t so good but it’s over. It’s time to be blessed beyond my yesterday and be so thankful for my today. Oh, and if you’re not liking your today so much… then change it! You do have the power to do that and with God in your corner, you’re one step closer to the today you want. 

*High-five*

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My Mayberry

Pam’s Journey ~ Day: 236

Miles Walked: 591

Miles Remaining: 409

Days Remaining: 130

I was able to visit a friend last week, and I must say that I felt some envy of her daily life. I know… that’s not a good thing, but I LOVED her job. She gets to go to work every day where people come in and hang out, encourage each other, and thank one another for what’s happening in their life. She owns a nutrition club and gets to help people every day who want to improve their way of life and that usually means that she’s going to be around positive people who are trying to make good choices.

Being surrounded by positive people.. yeah, that’s sort of my dream.

I enjoy helping people. Giving and caring, trying to make a difference.. that’s my thing. But, it seems that sometimes the more you give and try to help, the more some people just want to suck it out of you and drown you in their selfish negativity. What’s up with that? When did it become the norm for people to use harsh words and rudeness to get what they want? My friend/receptionist was telling me a story of someone she talked to last week.. this lady said to her, “why don’t you get off your butt and make my life a little easier?”. I think that means the same thing as “could you please help me?”, but apparently it’s easier to be rude than to pull out the manners card. That kind of blows my mind and what scares the heck out of me is imagining what the world is going to be like when the kids growing up with that influence is going to be like in another 20 years. Actually, I do know what’s up with that… it’s not God’s plan but I’m guessing that it makes Satan plenty proud of himself.

For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” ~ Galatians 5:14.  That can be a hard one.. especially if we don’t know each other.

I’m pretty sure that I had my vision of “the perfect” community before I ever heard the Rascal Flats song, “Mayberry”. Cheery houses with lots of windows, big front porches, front yards full of flowers that bloom through every season, and neighbors that you know well enough to keep your doors unlocked and not be shocked if they just come on in when they want to visit. I imagine a neighborhood full of people that you know, that know your kids, people who help each other if they need it, and neighbors that look out for each other. Call me crazy, right? I guess I want my Mayberry with an ice cold diet cherry coke.

Well I miss Mayberry
Sitting on the porch drinking ice cold Cherry — Coke
Where everything is black & white
Picking on a Six String
Where people pass by and you call them by their first name
Watching the clouds roll by

I grew up in the country and living in “the city” for years has worn on my idea of the perfect place to live. When I was growing up, I remember wanting so badly to have cable tv and to be able to have pizza delivered for supper. Since achieving those goals and having everything that I could ask for be a 10 minute drive away or less, I’m ready to move back out to the country and slow it down. It being Life.

The truth is, we don’t live on tree-lined streets with white picket fences. These are the types of communities that movies portray as perfect and safe. Most of us live in garage-door communities. We come in and out of our garages with little or no interaction with one another. That was me. Then I started feeling the nudge to get to know my neighbors. I started feeling that it was time to meet the people living next to me, maybe across from me, or the ones that I see on my way in and out of my neighborhood every day.
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” ~ John 13:34-35 

There’s not a lot of “loving each other” going on these days. It’s more like the “all about me” epidemic that has plagued the world. I want to change that. Am I praying for world peace? I just want to start with neighbor peace, parking garage peace, and co-worker peace. Then move it to traffic peace, grocery store peace, and maybe Black Friday Shopping peace. It’s easier to be rude and selfish to people that you don’t know so how about we start getting to know people. This isn’t an easy thing for me because I tend to be a house potato. Not a couch potato, but I like being in the comfort zone of my house. Getting “out there” isn’t an easy thing for me but I don’t think Jesus’ disciples reached people by sitting in their house or sunning themselves in their privacy fenced back yards. My idea of the perfect neighborhood isn’t just going to happen by itself.

On the weekends, my walk usually starts a little later in the morning than the normal 6am weekday walk. A few weeks ago, as I was walking around 7am, I noticed there were people out sitting in yard chairs on their porch or even at the edge of their garage. They were drinking coffee and reading their papers. They almost all waved to me after I waved to them and greeted them with a “Good mornin!”.  Some even asked how I was doing. The longer I walked, and the more people that I had interaction with, I realized that the vision of my Mayberry neighborhood wasn’t that far off from what I was walking in my very own neighborhood. We’re not exactly a white picket fence kind of neighborhood but I have some good neighbors… I just need to get out of my box and meet them, help them, and get to know them. My vision of the perfect community might be right outside my front windows.

 

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Momma always said…

Pam’s Journey – Day 215

Miles walked: 546

Miles remaining: 454

Days remaining: 151

I introduced you to my dad a while back.. well, in honor of Mother’s Day, this blog is about my mom – Anna, and some of her words of wisdom that have shaped my life.

To all of you moms out there, wouldn’t you have loved to know how hard it is to be a mom when you were a teenager? Think back to when you were giving your mom fits and treating her like most teenagers do. I would have.. I might have been a little easier to deal with, had I known then what I know now.

Momma always said, “Pretty is, is pretty does…”  (I got this a lot when I was acting up!)

Moms get the rough end of the stick.. They get the job of domestic and child rearing goddess and many still have to hold full-time jobs, and in their spare time they get to be chauffeur, chef, teacher, friend, enemy, knower-of-everything, fixer-of-problems, kisser-of-owwies, I could go on and on…. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are a LOT of super Dad’s out there that are awesome and some of them get these titles too but there’s something different about Moms.. (Dads, don’t be sending me your hate mail!  I just get to tell the story of Mom since that’s what I am.) Dads are generally easier than moms. Dads let the kids do more, go more, and have more freedom without worrying like moms do.

Momma always said, “You don’t need to do everything your friends do.. If they jumped off a bridge, would you do that too?” (she never liked my answer to that!)

My mom is the best mom I could have ever asked for. I assure you that I didn’t tell her this when I was growing up. I know it wasn’t a picnic raising me.. not that I was in lots of trouble, constantly  rebelling, or doing everything that I shouldn’t have been doing. I don’t think I was anywhere near that bad, but I was very very stubborn. I’ve outgrown that trait by now.. Ok ok, I haven’t outgrown it, but I can be stubborn now since I’m the one that has to live with me!

Momma always said, “Your stubborness is going to get you in trouble someday!” (at least she never said “I told you so” when it did get me in trouble!)

Knowing now how hard it is to feel like I’m being a good parent when my daughter does things that she shouldn’t be doing, I imagine this is how my mom felt when I chose to do things that I shouldn’t have done. It hurts. It hurts a lot to see your child do things that you know they will regret one day. Every parent has been there.. and every child that grows up to be a parent will be in the same position some day. We are all rebellious at one time or another. 

I recently finished reading a YouVersion devotion plan called Parenting by Design and it has helped me understand that parents are not responsible for everything that their children do. We can only raise them the best that we know how, teaching them what’s right and what’s wrong. God gave us all free will to make our own decisions and choices. When they get to the teenage years, they start exercising those choices more and more. As a parent, all I can do is try to instill good values and have faith that God will guide her and take care of her.

Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

The best thing about being a mom is now that I’m the one doing the raising and the teaching, I hear things come out of my mouth or I do things in such a way that is EXACTLY how my mom did them when I was growing up. It’s official… I’ve turned into my mom (and my dad too). All of those things she would say when warning me of my behavior and trying to encourage me to do the best that I could do, well now they come flying out of my mouth and I sound just like her. I must say that I kinda like it!

Momma always said, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” (So that’s who developed my silent treatment!)

No matter how hard I was on my mom, she was always there. She took care of me, helped me when I needed it, and taught me more than she will ever know. She taught me how to be a mom. I wouldn’t say that I parent anything like my mom did, but I take care of my daughter, I help her when she needs it (and sometimes when she doesn’t), and I know that I’m teaching her more than I will ever know. I consider being a mom my most important job so I’m thankful to have had such an amazing role model!

“But watch out! Be careful never to forget what you yourself have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren. ~ Deuteronomy 4:9 NLT

Thank you, Mom.. you did good!  

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Trust vs Faith

Pam’s Journey ~ Day 180

Miles walked: 443

Miles remaining: 557

Days remaining: 186

I’m going through a hard parenting phase. It’s not the phase of rebellious or ungrateful teenager (this time)… it’s the letting go a little phase. That probably didn’t make much sense, but it’s the time when my daughter is in high school and I know it’s time to let go a little. I don’t want to let go and my eyes are tearing up just typing this… and now my nose is sniffling too. We’ve been through lots of the teenage phases and most of them have been pretty short lived but I don’t know that any have bothered me as much as this one.

This has been coming on in waves for a few years but it’s gotten worse lately. It’s the closed door.  UGH… there’s nothing I hate worse than the closed door. It’s just me and my daughter at home so why do we need closed doors? Here’s an example: we’re hanging out together, maybe watching a movie in the living room, and the dreaded “bzzzzzzzzzz” happens and she jumps up, grabs her phone, runs to her room, and closes that oh so hated door. I’m sure most parents can relate.. or maybe I’m hoping most parents can relate because surely it’s not just me that this is happening to!

You’ve heard a lot about my daughter over the last 6 months. We have always been very close. She’s my chickie boo, I’m her mommy boo, we’re both dorkfish, we think alike and we get each other. That’s why the closed door is driving me crazy. There’s something that she doesn’t want me to get, or hear, or know about, or whatever. Friends come over and the door closes, the phone rings and the door closes, she’s on the computer and the door closes… all of this closed door business has been eating at me and finally manifested in a lack of trust. Because why else does she need the door to be closed? Why can’t I know what’s going on in there?

As much as I don’t like it, I know that she needs this space. Her space. <here come the teary eyes again> My problem here is Trust vs Faith. I know Taelor is a good kid (who likes to push the limits sometimes), and I have complete faith that she is going to make a difference in many many lives throughout her life. She’s a good person with an amazing heart and enough charm to captivate people and inspire them. Faith isn’t the issue. God has taken care of that. I have the faith to know that everything will turn out exactly like it should, but apparently I have trouble trusting the process of getting there. Trust. That seems to be where I’m getting hung up.

Admitting the problem is the first step to recovery, right? So, did I just admit that I’m not trusting my daughter… or did I admit that I’m not trusting God’s plan on getting her where she’s going in life?

Ouch…

I know that she is responsible for the choices that she makes and even though they’re not all the choices that I think she should be making, they’re still getting her to where she’s going. My choices would probably save her a little heartbreak but may not teach her the life lessons that she needs to be taught. That old saying “Momma knows best”… not always. I’ll admit that while Taelor hasn’t taken the routes that I would like to see her take, she is ultimately getting to the same finish line.

Giving everything to God isn’t the easiest thing for me to do, but giving my daughter to Him has been almost down right painful. I’ve only been trusting her to Him for the last couple of years. Oh, I thanked Him frequently for giving me such a easy going child when she was younger. She was an angel when she was a baby and even a toddler. I was so blessed by her and always said that God gave me what I could handle. So, I’m confident that while I turn my teen parenting challenges over to Him, He is only giving me what I can handle.

Today, I started my walk a few minutes after 6am and she is usually first in my Jesus conversations. I made my first loop and as I was approaching our house again, I heard our gate opening so she could take Beau for his walk. She meets me at the street and usually she goes the opposite way than me… but today, she turns around and walks with me. 🙂  We walked around that loop, and she was filling me in on all of her friends and boyfriend issues and what’s going on and we talked, laughed, and joked. She brought me up to date on what’s going on in her life since the last time she brought me up to date which was most likely just a couple of days ago.

I’m blessed that Taelor and I talk frequently about “stuff”. We talk when we’re getting ready for school and work in the mornings, we talk when we’re in the car going anywhere, we talk before bed, we actually talk a LOT… so, obviously I’m over reacting to the closed door syndrome. It’s not like she’s avoiding me or is setting off red flags with serious changes in her mood and personality. It’s just that I need to let go a little, and it’s one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I have to give her some room for her to grow into the person that I know she can be.

That loop, that one loop out of the dozens that I walk every week, was my best loop. So, while Momma doesn’t always know what’s best… God does.

…. and yes, she’s still my chickie boo and always will be!

“Me & you, Chickie Boo!!!”

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Dare to Fail!

Pam’s Journey – Day: 133

Miles Walked: 343

Miles Remaining: 657

Days Remaining: 233

I’ve been having a nagging feeling of failure the past few days. This nagging feeling is weighing on my heart because I haven’t walked for 6 days. I know it’s silly and I know that it’s not a failure but I also know that Satan isn’t happy about the purpose for this walk and he will take every opportunity to put a wedge in this growing relationship with my Jesus. I know my nagging feeling is his work.

When we first planned to start this walk there was a lot of talk about the “what this walk means and what it is and what it’s not”. I wanted to do the walk the second that Kristen mentioned it. The more we talked about it and then decided to blog our journey, I started getting a little nervous. Blogging? Me, writing? and other people actually reading what I write? I wasn’t so sure about that. I mean, writing is not something that I have ever enjoyed or felt that I was good at. My fear was giving Satan a plowed field to plant doubt… but 4 months into the walk and what do you know, writing isn’t so bad.

The other thing that made me hesitate even more about this walk was when we put a time limit on it. 1000 miles in 365 days. I had no doubt that I could walk 1000 miles… but in 365 (actually 366 this year!) days was a little intimidating. It averages to 2.74 miles every day or if we round up and walk 3 miles every day then it gives us 32 days overage to play with. So, if we are sick or weather prevents us from walking or any other unforseen reason would occur then we have 32 days of grace.

You may be wondering why this stresses me out.. you might say that it’s just a walk, and we have God’s grace and just the effort of doing this is kind of  inspiring. But it’s more than that. It’s a commitment. It’s a promise that I made to the One I’m walking with. What if Jesus didn’t follow through on His primary purpose? What if God had changed His mind, which would be completely understandable to me as a parent. Giving His perfect son for a world of sinners… I couldn’t do it. So, His promise means everything to me… and in my mind, my promise might mean something to Him.

I often refer to myself as “an unfinished project just waitin’ to happen”. I mean that literally and spiritually. Literally – I am famous (at my house) for starting projects and not finishing them.. like the almost finished paint on one of my dining room walls from last spring, the almost finished kitchen remodel from 2+ years ago, the multiple almost finished scrapbooks that are always “a work in progress”. I’m really good at starting projects and have every intention of finishing them but… the dining room has a vaulted ceiling so the wall is like 16ft tall and that’s a pretty good reason for putting it off.. and the kitchen remodel was a joint effort with my ex-husband and he kind of decided not to help me finish it and I never got around to it.. and well, scrapbooks are like a never ending hobby so that’s understandable too… right?

Spiritually – we’re all a work in progress… and I love this because it makes me feel better about my projects!

Oooops, I forgot about the wood trim that we replaced in my daughter’s room last summer and there’s 1 piece that goes above her closet door that never got put up… it’s in the garage, next to my nail gun and is just waiting for me to finish it. We won’t even mention my almost finished refinishing job on my coffee table.

The upside to this is that when I do get around to finishing my unfinished projects, they usually turn out amazing! I get compliments, I feel good about my work, and I can say that I accomplished something that maybe in the beginning I didn’t know if I would be able to do… which comes back around to this walk. I know this is one “project” that I will finish. But then again, I know that this will be another one of my famous unfinished projects because once the 1000 miles is finished, there is no way that I can stop this walk with Jesus. It’s like air and I don’t know that I can live without it.

Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you–unless, of course, you fail the test? ~ 2 Corinthians 13:5

Sooo… I’ve already watched the weather and there is no snow, ice, rain, or freezing fog in the forecast for tomorrow morning. You know what I’ll be doing at 6am, don’t you? Walking.. yes, walking!

Dare to Fail…

Try something new, start an unfinished project!

What we may think of as failures,

are sometimes God’s masterpiece…


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Parenting 101

Pam’s Journey – Day:124

Miles walked: 332

Miles remaining: 668

Days remaining: 242

It’s pretty obvious what this blog is about.. the title gives it away. This is something that is very dear to my heart and has been burning inside of me for awhile now. I know some amazing parents and I had amazing parents but I know it takes a lot of work to be a good parent. It’s more than a full time job and it takes selfless sacrifice, patience, humor, and lots and lots of love.

Does anyone really know what they’re getting into when they decide to become a parent? Unfortunately, it’s not as easy as it looks on TV. Sorry to disappoint anyone who clicked to get the easy guide to parenting. This isn’t a quick fix, I’m not a parenting expert, and there isn’t a one-size fits all parenting technique. What I do have to offer is how I feel about being a parent and some of my successes and struggles. Being a parent is my very most important job in the world.. I tell my daughter this frequently. Like when she wants me to stay out of her business, or when she tells me to quit stalking her Facebook, or when I want to know where she is, who she’s with, what she’s doing, and when she will be home. It’s my most important job and I desperately strive to do a GOOD JOB!

Where to start… I think it’s important to show your kids that you are human. You make mistakes, you learn from your mistakes, and you try to improve. Many parents want their kids to think they are always right and that they never went through the things that our kids are going through now. How can kids relate to someone like that? They can’t. How do you get inside the walls they put up and stay involved with them if they can’t relate to you as a human? Tell them when you make a mistake and apologize to them if you do or say something that you shouldn’t. Let them know that you’re not perfect.

I also disagree with the parenting books that say you can’t be friends with your kids. Yes, you do have to be their parent but you can have some friend time with them. Drop the role of supreme authority, stop being a dictator, and do some friend time with them. Be silly, do something that they want to do, laugh with them and let them laugh at you, get to know them and don’t judge everything they say and do during this time but listen and learn who they are and what they’re going through in this time of their life.

Pick your battles – Parents often think that their kids must obey everything that we as parents think are “the rules”. Yes, as a parent, you are “the boss” but is it really going to hurt anyone if your child wants a lime green bedroom or purple streaks in their hair? Let them express themselves in areas that won’t hurt anyone or they will be so smothered that they may pick more dangerous ways to show their independence. Blonde hair, red, black, 2 or 3 colors, poppin lips, maybe even a piercing… none of this will ruin their lives but they might just feel empowered that they were allowed to make a choice.  This is also the perfect time for them to learn that they get to live with their choices. Don’t fix all of their mistakes. Lead them and let them figure it out sometimes. Give them advice, teach them how to pray when they feel alone and like there’s no one on their side. Take all of these opportunities to show them how to lean on God. Raise them to know that Jesus was given to us as a man so that He can walk with us. Show them how to walk and talk to Him.

I have found that the fastest way to get your kids to do something that you don’t want them to do is to “forbid” them to do it. I try really really hard not to forbid things. After all, it is in our nature to want to do what is forbidden..

I meet a lot of teenagers who have no respect for their parents. As a parent I teach my daughter respect and I give her respect since I expect her to respect me. Many kids who act out have no respect for themselves. Our babies aren’t born knowing all of these things, it really is our job as parents to teach it to them! Don’t be shocked or disappointed when your kids don’t act the way you want.. teach them. Don’t be upset when they treat you the way you treat them or say the things that they hear you say.

Encourage your kids, they need it. We could all use to hear some encouragement sometimes but our kids desperately need it. They have so many people telling them what not to do, they need you to tell them how good they are at something that they do well. Help them find ways to express themselves that will keep them out of trouble. Art, music, sports, writing, tutoring, anything that keeps them doing something that will help them feel better about who they are… and please, please don’t tell your kids that they’re not good at anything.

Don’t tell them to leave and then be surprised when they do. Don’t tell them that you’re done with them and be shocked when they are done with you too. Don’t tell them that they’re worthless or a mistake. Don’t tell them that you don’t want to deal with them. You may think that parents would never do this.. but I’ve heard some parents tell their kids these things. Don’t break their hearts.. you may not be able to fix it.

Build your kids up, empower them, teach them, encourage them, love them up and don’t tear them down. Make being a parent and raising your kids to be good, responsible adults with strong values your very most important job in the world. Let them know that they’re your most important job and try to do a good job… they deserve it.

Just love them… Love them like God loves us.

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The Challenge! – part 2

Pam’s Journey: Day 113

Miles walked: 305

Miles remaining: 695

Days remaining: 253

So, this is it.. my list for yesterday. Starting from the second I woke up until I got to work. The time of day when it’s the same thing every day. My normal routine.. How much could there possibly be to be thankful for in doing the sames things that I do every day?

MY LIST

  1. 5:27 AM – I woke up.  – think this is obvious or something to be a little silly to be thankful for? well, some people didn’t wake up today.
  2. my alarm clock – I’m thankful that I can hear it, some people can’t.
  3. get out of bed – odd? well, I’m in a nice warm bed in a nice warm house. Some people don’t have beds or houses or heat, and some people can’t get out of bed on their own.
  4. walk to my kitchen – you guessed it.. some people can’t walk. I got a taste of this for a few months once. I’m very thankful to be able to walk.
  5. coffee – mmmmm. oh yeah, the luxury of a coffee pot, electricity, running water, etc..
  6. feed my cat – yes, my crazy, sleeps on my head half the time, SlickyBoo.
  7. check my email – where to start.. thankful for a computer, the mental ability to read and the freedom to write what I want… oh, and the friends and family that care enough to email me!!
  8. check the morning weather to see how many layers I need to wear for my walk – another luxury, tv.
  9. get ready to walk – sweats over yoga pants, t-shirt, light jacket, heavy jacket, scarf, gloves, earmuffs, hat, hood, shoes. Some people don’t have that many clothes in their entire wardrobe and I wear it all at once just to walk.
  10. wake up my daughter – I’m so blessed to have a daughter, an amazing daughter. Some people can’t have children or have lost their children and I’m lucky enough to get to wake mine up every day.
  11. leave for my walk, start my MapMyFitness app – yes, thankful for that walking thing again, and the luxury of having a cell phone that’s smart enough to track my walk with me.
  12. spend an hour with my Jesus – some people don’t have the freedom to worship God and I’m lucky enough to have a constant relationship with Him and to walk with my Jesus every single day!
  13. witness a beautiful sunrise – I’ve had a long time recurring dream that I can’t see (I’m blind) and it scares me like crazy. I appreciate being able to see all the beauty God gives me.
  14. make my bed – if I’m lucky enough to have one then I should definitely make it every day!
  15. pick my clothes for the day – some people don’t get to pick clothes or shoes.. all they have is what is on their body.
  16. shower – hot running water, in a house, with shampoo and soap.. crazy that we take all of this for granted every day, huh?
  17. get dressed and ready for work – I’m thankful for the physical ability to dress myself.. not everyone can.
  18. spend some morning time talking stuff with my daughter – I’m so lucky to have good communication with Taelor. To talk to her and keep up on what’s going on with her, her friends, school, boys, her new blog, just to spend time with her is precious.
  19. grab something for breakfast, lunch, and maybe a snack for the day – some people don’t even get 1 meal a day and I’m just randomly grabbing from cupboards full of food.
  20. start the car – you’re catching on enough to know that many people don’t have a car, right?
  21. drive to work – this is when I call my mom most days. Thankful for the cell phone again, and bluetooth of course so I can talk while I’m driving, and very thankful to have a mom to talk to!
  22. traffic – who appreciates slow traffic? Most likely the person in the wreck ahead that’s causing this slow traffic…they would appreciate it, and I appreciate not being the one causing the slow traffic.
  23. work – I’m so lucky and thankful to have a job. Not just a job but a job that I really enjoy and with people that I enjoy working with. How many people don’t have a job? The ones that do, probably more than half of them don’t like their job.. I’m very thankful for mine!
  24. Friday – after getting to do a job that I love all week, I’m thankful that I will get to spend time with my daughter this weekend.. Thankful that I have a house to clean, laundry to wash, a yard full of leaves that need raked, books to read, movies to enjoy, and food to cook up for next week. I’m thankful that I get to go to an amazing church on Sunday, hopefully taking one of Taelor’s friends, to worship with friends that are so fired up for God that it’s contagious!

Well.. it’s 8:30 am. That’s 3 hours of thankfulness. Three hours of my normal routine every day. You may think that my thankful list is absurd but if you start taking some of those things away from any of us, it makes a huge difference in the way we live our life. No bed? No shower? No daughter? I don’t even want to think about it so you can bet I will appreciate what I have, every day.

If you’re still with me in this list of thankfulness, don’t you think we can all slow down and appreciate the things we’ve been given? Even the smallest things that normally might be an irritation.. maybe there’s something to be thankful for in everything. Maybe we should be happy and content with what we’ve been given and not constantly want more. Maybe? Do we have to wait for November and for Facebook to tell us to post something every day that we’re thankful for? I’m suggesting that you be thankful for every second of every day because something amazing is happening somewhere.

As I’m typing out my list for you, I’m thankful that SlickyBoo is trying her best to walk across my keyboard and get in my way so she can lick my arm the way that drives me crazy. But that’s how she show’s me that she loves me and that she’s thankful for me…

Thank you Lord, for everything that you’ve given me.. I’m truly blessed!

Categories: Walk with JESUS | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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